A short post on depression

~ foodinbooks

Kate Spade’s and Anthony Bourdain’s suicides shocked the world, and has shone a renewed light on depression. It’s understandable. If people like them, who have fame, good looks, love, wealth, and a powerful voice, can’t fight the demons of depression, what hope do we regular folks have?

I have fought depression for years, like so many people. I’ve been in the worst depression of my life for the past two weeks, and am I am finally coming out of it now. To say these depressions are rough is an understatement, and for me, talking them through doesn’t really help.

I wish people would understand that sometimes talking does nothing. It compounds it. Being around certain people doesn’t help either – usually those people who tell you to “snap out of it” or who think you’re being dramatic or having a “moment.” Believe me, if I could snap my fingers and have my mental and emotional pain go away, I’d do it in a heartbeat. But I can’t, so I work through it in my own way.

My take on depression is this: reach out but also realize that sometimes, people may not want to talk. It’s great that there’s all this focus on calling a hotline number, but speaking for myself, I have no desire to share my feelings with a stranger nor do I want to dump my sadness on someone else.

That’s why I wrote this, not out of self-pity but because depression takes many forms and people deal with it in different ways, and there’s not a one-size-fits-all solution.

Now, back to our regularly scheduled foodie post.

Published by foodinbooks

I read, I cook, I travel, I love pugs, I drink wine, and I blog about food and books.

11 thoughts on “A short post on depression”

  1. Hi Vanessa – I’m sorry I am just getting around to reading this post, just so I could have maybe offered an empathetic greeting to you. I’m just glad that you have some way of getting through your depression. I know it hurts. And I hope you’re feeling better.💕

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    1. Thank you so much, Leslie. You are so very kind. I am feeling a little bit better, although we recently got some very sad news about my mother. She’s been diagnosed with stage 4 lung cancer and probably will not be with us much longer. So emotionally things are difficult but I am not in that same dark place. And definitely reading your posts helps keep my spirits up so I appreciate that.

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  2. Thanks for your post ! I’ve had several episodes of depression in my life, and one thing is certain, no “snap out of it” talk helps. I wish people could understand that it’s a mental health issue, not a choice. Just like no one chooses to have food allergies. I’ve tried talking about what depression is to people, but there is still too much stigma, so silence it is.

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    1. I understand. It would be my hope that people ultimately understand that it comes in so many different shapes and sizes. Depression can be debilitating, it can come out of nowhere or it can build it for a long time. Thank you for stopping by and commenting. Hang in there.

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      1. You too. You’re not alone. That’s what I love about the internet, you like someone’s writing and after a while you find out we all have something in common, even if it’s not related to our blogs.

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  5. I definitely understand. So does my man. After many years I recognize signs of a depression coming and I will tell him not to talk to me. A couple of years ago we almost split because of my depression. It was a tough time for both of us, sometimes talking is definitely not the answer especially since, in my case, it’s a chemical imbalance. There isn’t a reason, so there’s nothing to “talk” about. But, things will come out when I am depressed and it usually doesn’t go well.. It’s better if I say nothing at all becauee I get very irrational.

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